Saturday, May 5, 2012

Boston Musing (4)

“- "I've been thinking Hobbes --"
- "On a weekend?"
- "Well, it wasn't on purpose..."”

- Calvin and Hobbes. :)

I am not even sure where to start, what to write and how much or how less to express. What adds more to the feeling of drama is that I wish to scream through my words, do a little dance (with some Jiggy thrown in) and of course move self and all to tears with tales of glory, sorrow and group hugs. Yes, I am aware that it is not going to happen and it isn’t really that big a deal. But the thought goes well with all the exaggerated emotions I feel, having completed my first year of MBA.

The first year of MBA - done and wrapped. The second semester was definitely tough, what made it even more stressful was the Corporate Residency hunt. Looking for a job or an internship is never easy, and for someone as me who still feels so foreign in this lovely country, the hunt seemed formidable. It wasn’t so bad.   I did put in a lot of effort in planning and preparing for my interviews.  Networking with business executives really helped build an understanding of different opportunities and expectations in the corporate world. And the more I ventured the more I realized people love to talk about what they do and how. I'll be honest, it felt unnatural at the outset, often tiring -  talking to executives , trying to make an impression, and trying to get information, maybe an interview. As a business student, networking is a must -- embrace it, or resign yourself to it, either-ways you gotta do it .  Some interactions are wonderful and some downright painful, but it's fun, and you do learn a lot.  

The discomfort of being a foreigner here still lurks. To be fair, I have only been in this country for eight months. The environment was a new one; it brought forth a number of challenges, overwhelming changes and to a large extent an inferiority complex.  I fretted a lot, a lot and a lot. I am not very sure how I have fared in overcoming the complexes.  There was this pressure of defining myself, for I felt people saw me through the lens of an Indian stereotype, good or bad, it challenged my individuality, I did not like it; just because I would get questions and doubts about my writing and language skills.  I am not proud, but I let these insecurities get the better of me initially. It was half n half, a lot of it in my head and some of it in reality.  Before I moved here, I never represented anything other than myself, but here whether I like it or not, I do represent where I come from, a different culture and context, the affiliation and awareness stronger than ever before. The blending in has been an enriching experience with few faux pas , accent bashing, and of course getting used to all that is so different and so very new.  In the end, it comes down to perspective; I am who I am, and am finally comfortable being a ‘foreigner’. After all in my case it is another exotic differentiator J.

I am relaxed now, few days of break, a holiday in Rio de Janeiro followed by study program in Buenos Aires and Sau Paulo and then the start of my Corporate Residency. And did I mention just got back from New York City, very, very enamored. The summer is definitely looking up. The back is rested, the neck is swan and I glide in and out of intro and retrospection of the past eight months and the spring semester in particular. The Wall Street journal finally makes more sense than it should. I worked hard, learnt and experienced loads, built some important relationships and great friendships, most importantly I find myself smiling at the prospect of all the new beginnings and even tougher challenges on the road ahead.

The days remain packed.... 

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